The Rich and the Famous

Last night I attended a reading by author, Allegra Houston (yes, legendary film director John Houston's daughter)on her new book, "Love Child: a memoir of family lost and found" at the well known Taos venue, Mabel Dodge Luhan House. She and her brother live in Taos. I didn't realize it at first but I was sitting in the same row as her brother, Tony Houston, and right behind her husband, Cisco Guerva(with ties to Che Guerva). Alas Angelica was not there.... It seemed so natural, no paparazzi, no fanfare but alot of warm claps and hugs. Allegra is beautiful, in her early 40's, and chronicled her life with John Houston as her father. Throw in the fact that he wasn't really her bio father - a fact she only became aware of at 12 when she was unceremoniously introduced to John Julius Norwich(a Brit aristocrat who was married at the time that he and her mother had an affair)by Houston's fifth wife, Cici. Her mother, Ricki Soma, had died tragically in a car accident when Allegra was only four. John Houston had graciously taken over her upbringing despite the fact that he had long since split from her mother.

Allegra told some of her story and read a few sections of her book (too few - I was hungry for more). She had a slight british accent (which I swoon over)and was very sweet and charming. She ended her reading by calling up her stepson, Pancho, to sing happy birthday(along with the whole audience)to her husband, Cisco. One of my observations is that she married a man who is similiar in energy and physical appearance to Houston. Cisco is a larger than life character (he walked into the room with a huge felt hat on his head), a gifted storyteller and has a raucous laugh. Sounds a little oedipal to me. Someone told me that they're celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary tonite so it must be working. One of my coworkers told me that she has cared for their son, Rafael. I'm rubbing elbows with the rich and famous.

The Beat Goes On

Well can't compare to last week's blog of a mechanical bull, Nashville and Alabama. this week back to my usual schedule of writing, exercise, classes and working at the gym. Luckily I had scheduled myself a body work session last Monday as I was limping thru the day after the whirlwind of traveling over the weekend. Natalie Goldberg's class continues to amaze. It is different than any other class I have taken.... She does not critique our work; her aim is to build our "writer's spine" by imprinting upon us the importance of daily writing practice; and to allow our "wild mind" to surface - not judging whether what we write is good or bad. She believes that the inner critic is what shuts down writers more often than not and is responsible for many budding writers to quit their craft. I must say that it is a relief to read what I've written and know that I'm not going to get any critical feedback (I get enough of that in other classes); just commentary on the phrases, words, images that people like the most. Natalie studied with a Zen Master for seven years in Minneapolis, MN, and uses meditation on a daily basis to improve her concentration, focus and ability to be fully present to her mind.

On my coffee table I have all things Natalie: here's the list of books of hers I've read so far: "Long, quiet highway", "Banana Rose", "Thunder and Lightening", "Wild Mind" - and two I've just started: "Writing down the Bones" (actually her first book and most well known), and most recent, "Old Friend from Far Away". She said in the last class that by reading we can align ourselves with great writers, maybe some of their talent can rub off on us. I think it's a good sign that we both share some favorite authors - Carson McCullers is one of them.

I wish I had kept a book diary and recorded every book that I've read - with a little synopsis of what I thought about it. I think it would reveal alot about where I was in my life at the time I read it - highlighting issues and dilemnas. But I guess it's never too late to start. As usual I have about five books that I'm in the middle of: "Departures" by Paul Zweig (a memoir), "Our Losing Season" - Pat Conroy, "Writing down the Bones" - Natalie Goldberg and a book of essays by Charles Baxter on developing subplot in stories. Sort of like the way that I am with my knitting projects but the books are more of a constant and not so dependent on the cool weather to inspire me...

I'm off to a rewrite of a piece I did last week - it didn't get rave reviews - I have some serious revisions to do. Later on to Santa Fe to sit in Natalie's class and soak up her words hoping that they will serve as a springboard for my own writing.

Riding the Bull

Well this past week was full of new adventures. First was the beginning of Natalie Goldberg's memoir class on tuesday in Santa Fe. There were 22 people in the class and I'm sure we all hung on her every word. She was much more down to earth than I expected, showed up in class in an old sweater and pair of sweat pants. We started the class with a ten minute meditation with her reminding us that memory comes from stillness, the ability to quiet the mind so that images, thoughts, experiences can come forward. We did two in-class writing assignments - one was entitled, "what I remember" and the other was "what I don't remember". She stressed the importance at looking at opposites so that the hidden shadow side can be prompted to come out. It was obvious that there are many talented writers in the class, a bit intimidating...

And of course the BIG trip on Friday am - from Albuquerque to Dallas and then onto Nashville. A little excitement with messages/texts back and forth about a tornado warning in the area and a stressed phone call from my youngest sister, Gretchen, who arrived early in Nashville and was weathering the sirens, storm warnings, torrential rains by herself on the 19th floor of the Renaissance Hotel in downtown. By the time my middle sister, Marianne, and I got to Nashville all had blown over and we were ready to hit the town. After walking around in circles for a bit we discovered the main drag, Broadway Street, and its assortments of bars, restaurants and honky tonk shops - replete with cowboy hats for $5 and cowboy boots. We vowed to get matching cowboy hats for Easter brunch but somehow we never managed to pull that off. After a quick dinner of nachos and chix fingers, we scouted the bars on both sides of Broadway and began our drinking adventures. Each seemed to have live country music and as the everning wore on, more and more dancing. I spurlged and had several drinks, even half of one shot of tequila. This earned me the disdain of my sisters - though - because they told me that sipping shots was definitely a "no-no". Gretchen proved to be the wildest of the three and at the end of the night with a sufficient amount of alcohol consumed we found the bar that advertised the "meanest mechanical bull" in town and she rode it! Actually she did quite well and managed to stay on for quite a while - longer than some of the men we watched.
This was on her "bucket list" - along with completing a half marathon of 13 miles in March.

The wedding was anticlimactic after that night. My nephew, Michael, and his new bridge, Candance seemed very happy and on Monday they flew off to their honeymoon in the Bahamas. As the wedding offered no alcoholic libations there were many creative disguises used by family members to "smuggle" some in to the reception. Nips, flasks and water bottles were the weapons of choice. All went well and there were no conflicts, debaucles or disgraces...

Flew back on sunday afternoon and spent most of yesterday recovering - went to the gym but only had the energy to use the steam room and hot tub...

Shamanic Journeying

My new experience from last week involves Shamanic Journeying. The same person who did the sweat lodge (Apache traditional) also offers vision quests and drumming circles. I am often lured to try anything (within limits - bungee jumping and sky diving are definitely out)once and when my friend, Jan (my Tarot teacher) mentioned it I knew that I'd have to give it a go. Jim started the evening by giving an intro to the effects of drumming, its particular rhythyms, what they individually mean and how they induce altered states. He talked with me individually for awhile as he knew that I was a "virgin" and suggested that during this first journeying experience I hold the intention of meeting my power animal. In native american spirituality there is a belief that we have power animals and spirit animals that offer us protection, support, and guidance to hear spirit's messages. The drumming assists our unconscious in "traveling" to an altered state, similar to meditation, to have waking visions (dreams). Holding this intention proved helpful. The first thing I "saw" in my mind's eye was a bear. I asked whether he/she was my power anmimal and I heard "no, but I can take you to him." A long sequence ensued traveling across different types of landscape; the bear's fur changed from black to white (polar bear) when we got into the colder regions. We arrived at a cave and then I saw a snake and remembered thinking - oh, no, I hope that's not my power animal as I hate/fear snakes. Then I heard the roar of a lion and I knew instinctively that this was my power animal and had confirmation in the vision that this was the case. Towards the end I saw an eagle and had an experience of being lifted by the eagle to have a wider view of the earth and life. Jim told me the meaning of each animal - bear for healing; snake for transformation/awakened sexuality, lion for courgage and strength and lastly eagle for vision. He commented that I had quite a vision for my first journeying experience!

Writing practice this week has focused on my memories of a solo bus trip I took at age eight to Tonawanda, NY, to visit my Aunt and Uncle. I'm finding that memoir (at least for me)begins with a vague memory of an event that I then use creative license to turn into a story. Many of the details are not factual but the framework, time period and general emotional feel of the story are accurate. It's fun to combine truth with imagination and transform it with words into a story. I saw a biographical program on TV the other night on Annie Proulx (author of Brokeback Mountain, the Shipping News, etc)and she chronicled the process of writing her most recent novel, "That Old Ace in the Hole" over a period of two and half years.... At the end of it she said she thought it might be her last novel because the process took her so long - she much preferred writing short stories because she could crank one out within a month. I feel like the chapters in my memoir are each like mini short stories, fashioned that way because I read three pages/week in my writing groups. Because I'm reading out loud I often create a beginning, middle and end of each vignette. I've had the idea that maybe some of them could be published as "stand alone" pieces in literary magazines. Speaking of which I am working on editing twenty pages of prose to submit to "Discovery Awards" in New Mexico - specifically designed for unpublished authors. I'm also going to submit the same sample for a scholarship to the Taos Writer's Conference which will be happening July 12 - 19th this summer. Wish me luck!

Winter is here again

Last week was unusual weather for Taos. Cold, snowy and cloudy. We haven't had the combo since Xmas... My daughter Jenn was visiting from Colorado to take her Level II ski instructor's certification exam at Taos Ski Valley. The conditions were blustery and icey. Her exam was all day Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday and she passed! There were 30 people signed up for the exam and only 4 people passed all three days. For part of the celebration we went out to dinner at Graham's Grille (the home of the best key lime pie anywhere)and spent an afternoon at Ojo Caliente Hot Springs on Saturday.

Today it was 28 degrees when I left the house for my writing day, a bit of New England in the air. Beginning the first week of April I have signed up for an 8 week class by Natalie Goldberg on "Writing Memoir" in Santa Fe. That will mean late nights on Tuesday - the class is from 5:30 - 7:30 so I probably won't be home until at least 9 pm as it's an hour and half drive each way. Natalie has written at least 10 books (most famous for "Writing down the Bones")and I am eager to meet her and be one of her students.... I found out a few weeks ago that I didn't win a scholarship to the Women's Writing Conference at Ghost Ranch in August but am applying for one to the Taos Summer Writer's conference, which I need to work on soon because the deadline is April 15th.

Here's a bit of bright news. This is the first year in a long time that I will be getting a tax refund (a whopping $54.00!) due to the shortfall on my stocks/bonds. So yeah I don't have to pay the government any more money. Of course that does't quite make up for the amount I lost in the stock market before I took my money out in October but we won't go there. It also means I qualify for a reduction in my New Mexico health insurance because I earned below the median salary. So that's a blessing, too.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

I had a first this week. I was invited to participate in an authentic Apache Two Spirit Sweat Lodge on Thursday night, on the Spring (vernal)Equinox. I am claustrophic and sensitive to the heat so I knew this was going to be a real challenge.... The Lodge is located in Arroyo Hondo about eight miles from Taos in the Hondo River Valley. Jim, the Lodge Master, lives on 5 acres of beautfil sagebrush-filled land with beautiful mountain views. He has a Tepee, fire pit and traditional lodge. The lodge is made from birch saplings stretched and bound together with twine and then covered with canvas to create a small dome that you have to crawl into on your hands and feet and then sit on the ground around an indoor fire pit. Mercifully there were small rugs covering the dirt so we (there was 13 of us)could sit on them instead of dirt - although, truthfully as it started getting hotter and hotter I would have enjoy sitting directly on the cooler dirt and not care how dirty I got. As it was I got plenty dirty enough...

The ceremony consists of "four rounds", for the four directions (East, South, West and finally North). The stone bearer brings in 6-8 basalt (volcanic) rocks that have been heated in the outdoor fire pit all afternoon and carries them by pitchfork, one by one into the lodge. After everyone has situated themselves in the lodge the flap is closed and you are in complete darkness. The lodge master then ladles water onto the hot rocks, creating steam, after each person says a prayer for the direction of that particular round. Each round brings 6-8 more rocks, more water, intenser heat, etc. We were each given sprigs of sage to inhale to help us endure the heat and were thankifully given permission to lie down on the ground (not enough space to fully lie down - but in a modified fetal position - symbolic, I suppose)when we got too hot. I discovered a "trick" after getting through the first round, when I scrunched myself up on the dirt my hand immediately sought out the underneath of the back of the canvas - and then my hand found a hole and was released into the freedom and coolness of the outside air. This of course is not encouraged and in some lodges strictly forbidden. And I was determined to make it all the way through the four rounds and this was my survival technique. I must admit that as the rounds went on my silent prayer was that everybody's prayers were short. Laying down I can't honestly say I heard their prayers. I did however discover that when my hand found the space between the dirt and the canvas on the back wall I could lift it an inch and get a cool puff of air.

He allowed everyone the opportunity to take a "break" between the second and third rounds. Everyone except him left the lodge and went outside for 15-20 mins to cool down. This made it so much easier to endure the last two rounds. The ceremony started at sundown and I didn't get home until after midnight. After the ceremony was over we had a "feast" - a potluck that everyone contributed to - which is also part of the tradition. I don't know yet whether this was a first last or whether I will be called to do it again. We'll see. Maybe at the summer solstice.

He does hold other native american ceremonies - one of which is shamanic journeying which I do plan to try. "While in Rome, do as the Romans...." What better place than in the Southwest to try Native ceremonies. Speaking of which a long time friend is visiting soon so I plan to take that opportunity to visit the Taos Pueble and Chimayo (a Southwest "Lourdes" - known for its healing miracle waters and sacred ground).

Astrology 101

This week my new adventure was a 3 hour class in "How to read your own Astrology Chart" by astrologer, Julie Kelly. She had taken our birth info weeks before and created a "natal" chart for us. Wow! Talk about learning a different language. South nodes, north nodes, ascendent signs, planets, houses, moon, sun, etc. etc. It was a crash course. Fascinating stuff - although my zodiac sign is Gemini I learned other celestial influences that have created an influence on my personality, health and relationships. I certainly didn't absorb it all but have ordered a primer on it to help me decode some of the information. In my tarot class this week I discovered that my "life card" or soul's mission this incarnation is the "Hierophant" - a medieval term for teacher. My lessons have to do with being a student, a lover of knowledge and sharing this learning with others. Seems to fit and may explain why I love taking classes and learning new information all the time.

I wrote a short story this week about "Gym class" that high school nemesis - at least for me. Humorous and poignant at the same time. My teacher pronounced it almost flawless. I'll take it. I'm anxious to start an 8 week memoir class by Natalie Goldbery ("Writing down the bones"fame)the first week in April. She lives in Santa Fe but spent alot of time living in Taos when she was younger. She even wrote about it in her novel, "Banana Rose".

Blast from the Past - this coming week Holly Near comes to Taos and is performing at the Community Auditorium on Saturday night. I have listened to alot of her music over the years but have never had the privilege of hearing her live. She's a folksigner, political activist and bisexual. A pretty juicy combination....

Working Girl

The owner of Northside Health & Fitness Center where I work called in sick this week; the manager is out of town due to a family illness. The upshot was that they requested I help fill in with shifts. So I ended up working six days this week - a total of 37 hours... By the sixth day I was exhausted. I was grumpy. I was tired. And I didn't want to see the gym again - even to work out. So my sympathy goes out to all you who regularly work 40 plus hours/week. Yes, I definitely have become spoiled and am used to my free time and mostly stress-free life. Of course I do have stress - but it is self-generated by my own worries and occasional obsessive thinking. I didn't have much time to write, actually, none. Luckily I had written something earlier that I could bring to class on Thursday am.

And so I am grateful for my ability to work only parttime and have the luxury of the extra hours to pursue artistic endeavors. Of course there are tradeoffs. I haven't bought any new clothes for months, I don't own my own house and I rarely go out to eat. And a big chunk of my salary goes towards health insurance. And I wouldn't trade it for the world. I would rather have less material things and more freedom. Time is money, as they say. And if I look at it in that regard I am well paid indeed.

And I am discovering some new ways to generate income - one of which is doing Tarot readings. I did my first this week and charged for it. I am also charging for Reiki treatments and am currently knitting an adult size fisherman knit sweater. There's a Memorial Day craft fair at Kit Carson Park that I plan to sign up for to sell my knitted creations.

This next week only one extra shift scheduled.... Now to more writing.